Why Are You Stuck?
You know why people get stuck in repetitive thought patterns, habitual reactions, and emotional triggers?
Because they’re comfortable there.
That’s not to say they like it. For most, it’s just the opposite.
But it’s also their “Cheers”. The place where everyone knows their name, and where there’s a metaphorical barstool reserved just for them.
If you think about it from that perspective, it’s not hard to understand why so many people choose to stay stuck for significant periods of time.
(And I am using the word “choose” very intentionally.)
Here’s another aspect of moving forward that holds so many people back.
In order for anyone to move forward, they must leave something behind.
Think back to the Cheers example above.
If one of the characters were to get up and move forward by walking out of the bar, what would they be leaving behind?
Their friends. Their support system. Their comfort and security. (and their beer! )
And so it is with us.
See, here’s the problem.
Misery loves company.
Once you start moving in a forward, positive direction, you will probably experience what’s known as the “change back” effect, from your friends and loved ones.
They don’t want you to change.
They like the status quo. Your change is scary to them.
So they push back. Sometimes, pretty damn hard.
It may sound like, “What are you spending money on that for?”
“You don’t need to change anything. Everything is fine the way it is.”
“You’re going to cancel on us Friday night...again?”
“Why do you want to change your life? Aren’t you happy with me?”
When this happens (and it will), you’ll find yourself with an important decision to make.
Do you continue forward into the scary, uncomfortable unknown?
Or do you move back into predictable, stagnant comfort?
Change is never easy. It doesn’t always feel good.
But there’s no other way to grow.
And to grow, you must be absolutely committed to your journey.
Sometimes, that means letting go of things and people no longer serve your goals and your vision.
Even if it breaks your heart.
Even if it scares you to bits and pieces.
Even if you think you could never live without them.
(Trust me, you can.)
Listen, I would never presume to tell you what you should prioritize.
I will just say, for me, if I have to make a choice, I will always choose myself.
I will always choose to be the best version of myself. I will always choose the road less traveled. I will always choose growth, even if it means loss.
And I will always make these choices with absolute commitment and fortitude.
Remember this; heartache fades.
But the rewards of creating growth and self-awareness are immeasurable, life-changing, and life-affirming.
I hope you always choose you.
Sending you all so much love.
P.S. Let me know if this resonated with you. What emotions came up when you read it?