Staring Into the Abyss
Have you ever stared straight into the abyss?
I have. It's scary as hell.
I used to be a heavy drinker. Like, it took me two days to go through a 1.5 liter bottle of wine.
I loved my Yellow Tail Shiraz/Grenache blend.
On a Sunday evening, I ran out of wine. I couldn't go to the store for more because blue laws were in effect.
I kind of panicked.
And then I remembered.
I had two airplane bottle sizes of liquor in the cabinet. One was Kahlua and the other was vodka.
I drank them both. Separately. Over ice.
And then I had the epiphany.
"What the fuck am I doing?"
I knew in the deepest part of my soul that I had just put one foot down a very slippery slope.
So I pulled myself back up.
I stopped drinking on a daily basis. Now, it's a "once in a blue moon" type of occurrence. I can enjoy it within reason.
Here's the lesson.
It was my self-awareness that pulled me back from that edge.
it was the ability to look into the future and say, "That's not how it's going to go."
And the strength to choose a different path.
I'm not special. I don't have magical powers.
Every one of you has this power inside of you, too.
Is there an abyss you're staring into now?
Sending you all so much love. ❤️ Alissa